He looked up slightly, only to look back down again. Of course he recognized her voice, but he knew she wanted nothing to do with him. Why would she? She probably felt obligated to talk to him, for some stupid reason or another.
“Evening,” he said flatly.
In all honesty, he didn’t know what to say. Even if it happened that she didn’t hate him, it had seemed like forever since they last talked. What does one exactly say in a situation like that?
He glanced over the lake. He wanted everything to be the way it had back when they first became friends - he laughed inwardly, remembering the time they had gone looking for the Giant Squid - but he knew there was no chance for that. It had been enough work before trying to hide from his “friends” the fact that he was friends with another… muggleborn.
As per usual, he found himself unsure of what was right and what was wrong. He just wished someone else would help him choose.
She ignored the pain and guilt she felt at his flat greeting. If he didn’t think she hated him, he definitely had to hate her. She had essentially abandoned him, after all. “It’s been awhile.” Mary replied forcing her smile to stay cheery.
Severus scolded himself; Mary would never back down from a conversation. It was funny, she had enough determination to make a Slytherin blush. He had no right to shun her off like this. Hell, it was a miracle that she even wanted to speak to him again.
“So it has,” he replied, trying to ease away from his flat tones.
“How- how have you been?” Mary asked relieved that he seemed to be lightening a bit. This was much harder then she anticipated.
(Source: mismarymac)
ooc: I have forgotten about this RP. I really miss it so so so much! I am all for reviving it. We can all post Admin posts on our personals to try to get recruits. I think this RP is worth saving because we all became so close because of it. We will just have to pick which characters aren’t coming back, and recast them.
I love and miss you all!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
this. all of this.
He looked up slightly, only to look back down again. Of course he recognized her voice, but he knew she wanted nothing to do with him. Why would she? She probably felt obligated to talk to him, for some stupid reason or another.
“Evening,” he said flatly.
In all honesty, he didn’t know what to say. Even if it happened that she didn’t hate him, it had seemed like forever since they last talked. What does one exactly say in a situation like that?
He glanced over the lake. He wanted everything to be the way it had back when they first became friends - he laughed inwardly, remembering the time they had gone looking for the Giant Squid - but he knew there was no chance for that. It had been enough work before trying to hide from his “friends” the fact that he was friends with another… muggleborn.
As per usual, he found himself unsure of what was right and what was wrong. He just wished someone else would help him choose.
She ignored the pain and guilt she felt at his flat greeting. If he didn’t think she hated him, he definitely had to hate her. She had essentially abandoned him, after all. “It’s been awhile.” Mary replied forcing her smile to stay cheery.
(Source: mismarymac)
He’d taken up his daily walks around the grounds again; for a while, he’d convinced himself that he’d do it just out of want, but it had become more of a need over time. Even in the semi-sanctuary that Hogwarts presented to him, there never seemed to be a place where he could really clear his mind. Well, other than on his solitary walks.
Of course, Hogwarts never had been the sanctuary he’d expected to find when he left his father, blindly drunken on the living room floor, and got on the Express for the first time, but things never seemed to turn out as he’d expected them to. Take Lily for example; he’d foolishly hoped that there was a sliver of a chance for him to ever end up with her, but that chance had been taken from him before he could even get a word in.
Even with someone like Mary; he’d assumed she’d finally come to her senses about him. He hadn’t seen her in ages, or so it felt like, but he convinced himself it was for the better. At least for her better. What good would she find in a poverty stricken, angry, lonesome Death Eater. He knew their friendship wasn’t ever going to last, hell, he hoped for her sake it wouldn’t.
It was past curfew, but he couldn’t care less. The worst they could do to him was throw him out, and even that didn’t seem too bad an option anymore. He leaned against the familiar birch tree by the lake, sliding down to the ground with a sigh. He would give anything to start over again.
She hadn’t thought this through. How exactly does one approach someone they had been avoiding -for the lack of a better word- for ages. Especially someone she already knew was much to hard on himself and probably just assumed she no longer wanted anything to do with him.
Not true at all of course, but he probably didn’t know that.
Regardless, if she wanted her life back she was going to have to talk to him at some point. And seeing as how Severus was only right there at the same birch tree he always seemed to return to, she didn’t really have much of an excuse.
“Hey, Sunshine.” she greeted, trying to ignore how nervous she was by smiling as friendly as she could.
(Source: mismarymac)
She had been wallowing in her own self-pity for much too long, and enough was enough. It was all well and good to feel sorry for yourself, to just give up all together, for a while but eventually you’re gonna have to just get over it. It was time to straighten up, snap back into focus and get back to living life. And that was exactly what Mary was planning on doing.
Thinking back now she almost wanted to curse herself into oblivion for being so pathetic and utterly stupid. Since when had she ever let anyone else control her life…even if she did love him and even if it was completely unintentional and unnoticed by him.
Mary MacDonald was not the type of girl to just lie down and give up. She was a fighter damnit. She didn’t become Co-Captain of the quidditch team by just giving up. It made her sick, thinking about how sorry and weak she had been the past couple of months.
It was time to change that. She was going to get her life back if it was the last thing she did. She was going to start training again, starting winning again, start seeing her friends again. See him again.
That was the worst part, she thought, not seeing him for so long. And not just because she was in love with him either, but she missed his friendship. She missed the ease and familiarity and warmth. She missed how they could talk about anything, and joke about more or the times where they didn’t need to say anything at all, they could just be.
And she missed Severus, and how despite the fact that he was so horribly down on himself and painfully sad that he still managed to smile for her. It had been much too long since she had talked to Andromeda -why she wasn’t quite sure. If there was anyone that could brighten her day, it was Andy. Molly and Lily and their infallible way of comforting even the harshest of wounds were greatly missed too.
The worst part about it all was that she knew it was her own damn fault. But that was behind her now, and it was time to get back in the game. First things first she needed some fresh air, and a good long walk on the grounds.
James had been spending a lot of time on the pitch-when he wasn’t studying, doing homework, or doing his Head Boy duties-with all the team members. Since he was the team captain, he wanted to do some one-on-one training with everyone-but especially the new members-in addition to the regular practice schedules. Today was his one-on-one day with Mary. Lately her performance had been less than it usually was, and James wanted to get to the base of the problem, so she could play to the best of her ability. He didn’t like to pry into her private life, but she was his friend, and the keeper for the Gryffindor team. If something was up, he’d help her get through it enough to get her head in the game.
He got changed into his Quidditch uniform, grabbed his broom and a Quaffle, and walked out onto the field. He waited for her for a few minutes. When she emerged from the changing room, he told her to take her position by the goal. He was going to see how well she played before they talked. He figured there would be no point talking to her if she was playing just fine.
If someone had asked Mary MacDonald a year ago if anything would get in the way of Quidditch or if she would ever spend more then five minutes studying, she would have laughed in their face. Now it seemed not even quidditch to make her feel as carefree and happy as she used it. It was getting harder and harder everyday to see them together, so much so that she had avoided being around Sirius anymore then absolutely necessary. And soon it had gotten to the point where she was avoiding everyone entirely, it was much easier that way, much easier to wallow in her own self-pity. Easier not to have to listen to everyone else’s problems, selfish as it was. Much easier to avoid Mulciber’s ever-increasing taunts and attempts to hex or curse her, not that he was ever very successful.
She flew to her position almost listlessly, trying her hardest to dig out the old Mary, the one that would have been taunting James mercilessly right now. Mary who planned to play professionally.
James started off slowly, throwing the Quaffle at different distances. Mary was getting most of them, but she certainly wasn’t on her A game. James wasn’t even throwing them to the best of his ability. He wanted to stop, and tell her to get her ass into gear, but he knew that wouldn’t help whatever emotional crisis she was going through because of the widely known about break-up with Damian. He was now worried about what would happen when Gryffindor would have to play Ravenclaw. Mary wouldn’t come into contact much with the Beater, but she’d certainly see him flying around. James didn’t need her to be distracted. “Mary, do you want to stop? I mean, we can. If you’re not feeling well or whatever, it’s futile to be out here practicing.”
Mary sighed “I’m not sick, James.” she told him almost surprised by his lack of anger. James was just as passionate about Quidditch as she was…used to be…still was? What did she know. She didn’t know anything anymore. “I’m fine.” she added, her usual response, the only thing people seemed able to get out of her anymore. “I need the practice anyway if we’re going to win against Ravenclaw.” there was only a tiny spark of the old fire that used to burn in her at the thought of a game, of playing and winning.
James had been spending a lot of time on the pitch-when he wasn’t studying, doing homework, or doing his Head Boy duties-with all the team members. Since he was the team captain, he wanted to do some one-on-one training with everyone-but especially the new members-in addition to the regular practice schedules. Today was his one-on-one day with Mary. Lately her performance had been less than it usually was, and James wanted to get to the base of the problem, so she could play to the best of her ability. He didn’t like to pry into her private life, but she was his friend, and the keeper for the Gryffindor team. If something was up, he’d help her get through it enough to get her head in the game.
He got changed into his Quidditch uniform, grabbed his broom and a Quaffle, and walked out onto the field. He waited for her for a few minutes. When she emerged from the changing room, he told her to take her position by the goal. He was going to see how well she played before they talked. He figured there would be no point talking to her if she was playing just fine.
If someone had asked Mary MacDonald a year ago if anything would get in the way of Quidditch or if she would ever spend more then five minutes studying, she would have laughed in their face. Now it seemed not even quidditch to make her feel as carefree and happy as she used it. It was getting harder and harder everyday to see them together, so much so that she had avoided being around Sirius anymore then absolutely necessary. And soon it had gotten to the point where she was avoiding everyone entirely, it was much easier that way, much easier to wallow in her own self-pity. Easier not to have to listen to everyone else’s problems, selfish as it was. Much easier to avoid Mulciber’s ever-increasing taunts and attempts to hex or curse her, not that he was ever very successful.
She flew to her position almost listlessly, trying her hardest to dig out the old Mary, the one that would have been taunting James mercilessly right now. Mary who planned to play professionally.
